12-18-2013 Fiction

Dessert

He rubbed between my legs. Even though I wanted this, I feared being caught. I grabbed his forearm, but he was too strong. I look up at him and tell him to stop.

"No," he breathed near my ear, "No. No."

I forgot what existed around us when he spoke. Wildly, I start to undo his pants, but his belt deterred me. I go back to rubbing his hard on through his jeans. He unzips his fly and helps me pull his dick out. All I can think of is how badly I want to make him cum. Our environment enters my thoughts again, but I push it out of my mind.

I didn't see him remove his belt. I was too focused on helping his cock out from his pants and into my mouth. Seated in my car in a public parking lot, I nervously glanced around real quick to make sure no one was walking towards us. The steering wheel forced me to crane my neck, but the reward proved worth it; I finally got his dick into my mouth.

He grabbed my hair and pulled me firmly away, just enough so that only my tongue could reach him. I pulled forward from his grip. I wanted to taste him and I wouldn't be stopped. I had fantasized about this since I first met him. I was so close. His grip- strong, but he relented and allowed me to enjoy him. Then, he grabbed a handful of my hair again. Soon, his belt looped around my neck and tightened against my throat.

As I leaned forward, my throat pressed more against the belt, restricting my breathing. It caused a dizziness that inebriated me quickly. My lips curled into a smile around his shaft. I stopped to give the parking lot my attention for a second; I then continued to pleasure him in broad daylight, the thought of getting caught never leaving my mind.

He came without warning, which made me choose between gasping for air or swallowing the load. I swallowed him first then sat up trying to catch my breath. A couple emerged from the nearby restaurant and quickly were next to us, getting into their vehicle. I couldn't be sure if the belt around my neck was visible, but he spoke with them so casually, I don't think they suspected a thing.

As they pulled away, we chuckled. I think I thanked him for lunch and dessert, but I'm not sure. I couldn't think real straight. Soon, we had to part ways for other obligations, but I sat in my car for several minutes, staring off with a huge smile slapped on my face. My pussy pulsed. I looked around again then slid my hand down into my jeans. I touch myself underneath my black panties.

The back of my hand slid along the smooth silk, its fingers found its target and I exhaled loudly. My other hand felt around my neck as if seeking out possible markings left from the belt. It then rubbed my cheek he had bitten beforehand. My cheek felt tender and touching it made me pulse again. My fingers came out soaked. While I looked at them, I decided to finish ... right there in the parking lot. I didn't care if someone saw.

9-16-2013 Fiction

Cum

I was nervous. He had me undress and he left the room. Some time had past and to be honest I was starting to get a little chilly, so I got up from the bed and wondered about the room. I read the titles of his many stack of books that cluttered the room. I looked at some dusty knick-knacks and novelty bric-a-brac. I sighed loudly. I stood in front of another stack of books, leaning forward ever so slightly. Suddenly two hands fell onto my hips, pulled me back against his hard on, and then spun me around.

My face and upper body landed hard on the bed. His hands were at both my wrists, holding me down, and he leaned forward and breathed in my ear. Kissing from my ear, down the groove of my neck, he bit feverishly into my shoulder. I cried out but I was muffled by the bedspread underneath my mouth. He went back to my ear.

“I’ve been waiting so long to get my hands on you,” he whispered.

He slid his cock inside of me slowly and easily. My wet pussy stretched for his wide shaft. I moaned into the bed. Leisurely, he teased me with deliberate motions—all the way in, almost all the way out. I wanted to beg Faster, but I couldn’t make words. I bucked my ass against him repeatedly, physically pleading for more. Harder. Faster.

“Please,” I finally uttered from the side of my mouth.

He ignored me except for a short chuckle. He maintained his pace. I kept squirreling underneath him in hopes to push myself over the edge into orgasm. He started to pick up more rhythm. Yes! He then started going very fast and hard, making a thud of fleshy impact with each thrust. My body felt the tension growing. Then … he stopped. He let go of my wrists and pulled away.

“Why?” I begged.

He answered by slamming into me again with an animalistic roar. He came inside of me, deep. I could feel his cock pulse and I trembled and tightened against him. He placed a hand on my mid back and pulled his dick all the way out. I had him swishing around inside of me and that made me feel hot all over. I grinned and rolled over to face him.

“Quick, get dress,” he ordered, “We are going to get some lunch.”

“What?” I blurted out.

“You,” he said slowly, “are going to go out in public with my cum inside of you. I am going to enjoy watching you as you feel it dripping out of your pussy, making such a mess of those sexy panties of yours.”

I didn’t know how to react. The thought of this, though, made my clit ache happily. I got dressed. He already had a place in mind, a small diner not too far from his place. I’d never been there before. I could already sense the warm mess making its way back down before I even got out of his car, but when I did get out, the air hit the dampness.

“Wow,” I muttered.

“What?” He asked.

“I can feel …” I trailed off.

“Let’s see how well you can keep your composure, little one,” he laughed.

“Oh, I’ll be good,” I assured him.

“Yeah, we’ll see.”

He sat down at a booth and motioned for me to sit across from him. I slid into my seat and felt something wet shift from the center of my panties to my leg. Great I thought. As we sat looking at the menu, I got really horny knowing I was a landfill of cum. I figured I’d be sly, go the restroom, cum, and be back in time to place my order.

“I hafta pee,” I whispered to him and I started to leave the booth.

“Sit down.”

“Sir,” I insisted, “May I go to the restroom?”

“Not yet.”

Fuck I thought. Now that I was denied the privilege, I really had to pee. The waitress came and he ordered for the both of us. She went away and he leaned in and took both of my hands into his. He smiled.

“My lovely lady,” he said, “How bad is it?”

“Not bad, messy I can tell.”

“Do you think our waitress can tell you have such a huge load drizzling out of you?”

I stared at him with a goofy look on my face. I felt my face go red. I suddenly wondered if anyone—everyone knew we had just fucked. I slowly smiled and shook my head no.

“Go into the restroom and take a picture of your panties with your cell phone,” he instructed.

“Can I-“

“Yes, you may pee,” he grinned, “But … do not make yourself cum.”

“Yes Sir.”

I hurried off to the restroom, cell phone in hand. I relieved myself and took the picture he requested. As I wiped, I slid my finger across my clit. It was so hard. It pulsed. I felt myself blush again and grow very hot. I really wanted to cum, but I would obey. Minutes later, I returned to the table. I slid the phone over to him just as our food arrived.

“Very nice,” he murmured.

“Thank you, Sir.”

“Not as big a mess as I’d have liked. We’ll work on that.”

We ate and paid the bill. Outside, he opened the backseat car door for me. I looked up confused but got in. He drove us to the very rear of the parking lot. He turned the car off and got out. Getting in the backseat with me, he started to undo his pants. He gave me a look, so I did the same.

“I need to pump some more into you, my dear,” he said.

I spread my legs as far as I could. One foot was in the recessed back window, the other one dangled over the front passenger headrest. He entered me rather gingerly until we both got into a good position. It’s broad fucking daylight I thought. He jammed his thick cock into me and went at it like a high school quarterback. It was hard and rapid and took all of two minutes. He growled with ejaculation this time, with two hands full of tits.

“That was just to make sure you have enough of me inside of you,” he said, zipping up.

We drove back to his place. I started climbing up his stairs to his bedroom when he told me to stop. I was told to undress and lay myself down on the stairs. I obeyed. And several minutes passed by. Finally, I lifted my head up to look.

“I didn’t ask you to look around,” he said sternly.

I put my head back down onto the back of my hands. I could feel the cum dripping out of my pussy, onto his stairs. It dawned on me—he was watching that. Fucking hot. I lifted my head once more.

“Sir?”

“Yes?”

“I think I am running low again,” I said seductively.

“We can’t have that,” he replied, “it’s high time I make you cum now.”

He straddled me swiftly, apparently having already been naked. His cock went in so deep it hurt. And he pounded me. The stairs dug into my knees. My hands shot up to protect my head from slamming into the instep. He’d beat his dick into me over and over while all I could do was whimper with pleasure. I was in a position where I could not move; restrained without any chains, handcuffs, or rope. Ecstasy. I felt my clit start to throb.

“Can I cum?” I moaned.

“What,” He said in a corrective tone.

“Can I cum, Sir?”

“Yes, baby.”

I felt the familiar twitching. This time, though, the build up all day had me in hyper drive. Having had his loads inside of me and dripping down from me most of the day had turned me on to levels of horny I’ve never been before. My lips parted and I moaned and it turned into a yell as he started to furiously thrust into me.

My pussy tightened around him so intensely he had difficulty moving. He pushed his huge cock in a few more times as I thrashed around underneath him in my pleasure. He grabbed my hair and pulled it, making my head lift up. He sunk his teeth into my neck as he shot his last load of the day deep into me.

“Don’t clean up at all,” he said, “Drive home, with me leaking out of you.”

I merely nodded my head. I didn’t want to clean up tonight. My clit jerked slightly with the notion. I’d likely finger myself on the way home and cum again. I would sleep with as much of him as I could keep nestled inside of me. Hygiene would wait until morning, when the moment is gone and reality comes back to carry me off.

“I want a picture of those panties when you get home,” he said softly.

“Yes … Sir.”

9-5-2013 Fiction

The Voice

The voice. It spoke to her in such a stimulating cadence, that her thoughts began to splinter and fall away. She couldn’t turn anything into sentences. She stammered. His voice reflected joy at her incoherent, weak attempts to steer the conversation back to the realms of normalcy. He never chuckled at her, at least out loud; he was aware she was falling further under his influence. His voice, it created fantasy swirling around her head.

She grew dizzy and removed her glasses, laying herself down on her red satin sheets. Her discomfort grew; she threw those glasses back on again in an effort to refocus. He seemed to sense her hesitations. He allowed for the ebb and flow as his dictation tore down the innermost walls of her mind. She was strong willed- a challenge. She was no match for him; she treaded the waters of this sensuality long enough and was weary. Finally, she relented.

“You still with me, baby?” He asked.

“Yes, Sir,” she replied unsteadily.

“Good,” he said, “I’m going to grab your head by the hair and pull you down onto my cock. I want to hear you gag on it.”

Her pussy dripped out a little more. She reached into her jeans and felt her damp panties. She smiled. This was intoxicating; a warm fire spread throughout her body and her breathing became low and heavy. Certain words he said were triggering her, almost as if he were hypnotizing her somehow, and she wanted it. She, however, still couldn’t let go completely. She struggled.

“Let go,” he coaxed.

“I- I can’t,” she confessed, “We need to change the subject.”

“I want my hands on you,” he said sternly, “I want your mouth. I want you to taste me. And I’m going to taste you.”

He continued telling her all that he’d do to her. She sunk deeper into her bed. Her hands alternated while she pleasured herself. She kept stopping out of fear. The sensation was all wrong! It felt too good. She felt like she’d finish at any second. That wasn’t normal.

None of this is normal, she told herself, I can’t be this indescribably horny from mere words, not at my age.

Then, it happened. A mere thought stopped her fun. A memory of her previous life blew through her mind and slapped her awake. Her physical scars began to hurt. They belittled her. Dammit, she thought. His voice paused.

“You are with me,” he said.

Was it a question or a statement? Did he know what had entered her mind? She felt guilty and ashamed of her past. She lowered her head and almost dropped the phone.

“I am with you,” she said.

“Tell me what is happening to you?”

“I just can’t,” she stammered, “I can’t let it go completely.”

“Baby steps, babygirl,” he said.

“Yes, Sir.”

“Now, relax. Are you comfortable with this?”

“Yes,” she squeaked out.

“Now,” he instructed, “tell me how wet you are.”

“Very,” she replied, “soaking through the panties.”

He began again, the gentle cadence; his words falling back and forth against her mind. She closed her eyes, removed her glasses, and settled in again. Her fingers sought out her wetness. Her middle finger slid alongside her hardened clit and a moan escaped her. She heard him moan in reaction.

Quickly, her moans became too difficult to hold back. There was no lengthy build up that took forever, she was just immediately on the edge again. She heard his voice change here and there; he was experiencing this with her. She smiled at the thought of him stroking his thick cock.

“You want to cum?”

“Yes.”

“Ask for permission to cum,” he demanded

“Sir, can I cum?”

He didn’t answer her. She panicked. She knew she hadn’t the discipline to hold back such an intense orgasm. It was already starting to bloom like a flower within her, each petal tickling the sensitive nerves.

“Please, please, can I cum?” She begged frantically.

“Yes.”

Instantly, her head was thrown back violently and the phone slipped down to her side. She felt it happen in waves, like the orgasms she had back when youth had been hers. She left her fingers atop her pulsing clit, trying to calm things down. She reached for the phone just in time to hear him explode into THE moan. She knew he came and he came hard.

They sat listening to each other breath and sigh for a few minutes. She basked in the afterglow bliss and stretched fully. She felt like a cat in the sunlight. While the warmth of lust evaporated, it was replaced by this unique harmony they shared.

“How are you?” He asked her.

“Amazing,” she said breathlessly, “that was amazing.”

7-10-2013 Fiction

The Storm

The taps at the window have ceased, and the clouds roll by on the amber horizon. These tears of Heaven reach a saturation point. The storm inside of me rolls away. As the dust scatters upon my bruised flesh, my dreams climb out of the soot. The only thing remaining is my insatiable thirst for pain.

The night had been long and my body now weakened. I lay limp in bed already fantasizing about the next time. I close my eyes and drown into the depths of this lust. He reaches over and touches my leg. I smile and replay the night in my head.

Slowly, he had built up my anticipation as he set out the tools of the trade. A whip took its esteemed place on the nearby table. Items followed one by one: a set of knives, two handcuffs, a yard stick, metal arrow shaft, and crude, self- made spreader bar. The spreader boasted a bright red chain inside of a shiny silver pipe. I sat watching and trembling.

He ignored me while he worked. My shoulders so tense had shaken themselves loose. I let out a low sigh. He sensed my relaxation and turned to me. A glimpse into his eyes;

Disapproving, I lowered mine humbled by the power of his mere presence. My head he pulled forward and brushed my hair aside with his hand. In the other hand, he held a worn leather collar.

Once properly collared, I wiggled off the bed to the floor. Kneeling before him, my hand instinctively wandered up and softly cupped his erection. My hand is immediately whacked away. I looked up, surprised.

“Did I tell you to touch me?”

“No,” I replied sheepishly.

“Since,” he said, “you like to feel around … I’ll restrain you in the front rather than the back.”

He took my left wrist first and secured leather cuff. He followed this by locking the strap in its place. The right wrist was dealt with next. The smell of the leather intoxicated me and I grew dizzy. He abruptly shoved me backwards and straddled me.

“Do I scare you?” He asked deliberately mocking the fear he saw in my eyes.

“No,” I said defiantly.

“Don’t worry, I will, little girl.”

He then grabbed the spreader bar from the table and gave a sadistic grin. He pulled my leg towards him. Quickly he wound the red chain around my ankle and attached a small, black padlock. He took my other ankle and did the same work. He then stepped back to admire his handiwork.

“Ah,” he sighed happily as he lifted the bar in the middle.

My legs reluctantly rose up and the inflexibility of my muscles dutifully kicked in.

“Fuck,” I blurted out.

“Ssh,” he said, “slaves don’t talk unless their Masters tell them to, okay?”

Before I could reply, I felt him sink his hard on into my vulnerable pussy. As quick as it went in, he removed his cock completely, dropped the bar, and walked over to the table. A whimper escaped my lips. He looked at me with amusement.

“What was that, my little bitch?”

Again, as I opened my mouth, he lifted the bar, but dropped it. Then, he slapped my face hard! I licked my lips in excitement, and he hit the other side. Now, we were ready. My pussy was dripping wet like a school girl’s and I felt alive.

Looking in my eyes, he raised the bar and thrusted himself in deep. It was so deep it hurt. As he fucked me, he reached up to an exposed tit and squeezed it until my nipple reddened and turned painfully erect.

I noticed that my left wrist was slowly twisting out of the cuff. I could easily pull it out. Seeing this, he stopped but kept his dick inside of me. He watched me toy with the cuff and leaned forward. My legs bent backward further to the point I growled.

“If you take that off,” he said, “I will fuck you in your ass. I won’t stop if you beg. I don’t care how many times you safeword out. I will fuck your tight ass until I cum. I don’t warn but once.”

I slipped the cuff off with medium effort. I stuck out my tongue playfully but he didn’t return the favor. Instead, he pulled out and quickly removed the chains from my ankles. I protested but was ignored. I heard the spreader hit the floor with an exaggerated clank. I was spun over onto my belly so fast all I had time to do was gasp. The fear hit me immediately. He roughly entered my backside with only some spit as lubrication. I screeched and he smacked the back of my head for silence.

I grabbed up the blanket and took it into my mouth. I bit down hard. My fingers clutched around the sides of its corner. My muffled cries fueled him as he pounded away my punishment.

“I’m sorry! I’m sorry!” I sobbed.

“I don’t care,” he growled heatedly.

Then he came inside of me with an animalistic grunt. I secretly smiled knowing I had given him something I have always denied him. He slowly pulled out and told me to go clean myself up. From the bathroom, I heard him whistling as he put away his toys. I glanced at myself in the mirror and smiled. Afterward, I fell into his bed exhausted and happy. Then, outside the window, a storm starts up.

Introduction Journal

I'm an emotional sadomasochist. I thrive on giving and receiving pain, in particular, the emotional variety. I occasionally write erotica that is fantasy-driven only and not educational as to healthy boundaries in these particular relationships. I try to remember to disclaimer those to differentiate between scenes that are hurtful but helpful and triggering scenes that may/ do cause harm. 

If you're under 18, I ask that you do not read this blog. If you continue, it is assumed you are a legal adult and I cannot be held liable for information or ideas you glean from this blog. This type of play isn't exactly popular. It is vastly misunderstood and, as with any group of people, there are abusers who will twist your mind about what is acceptable in any fetish or kink. Please do your diligent research before engaging in anything. 

I can't really say much about me. I started the lifestyle young before I knew there was an entire community of people like me. So I'm never sure what number to give when asked how long I've been in the lifestyle. Officially, it's probably going on 12 years if I go by my being aware of the lifestyle as a whole and where the bulk of my experience is.

I'm not overly sexual I'm my play or in real life. I'm not ashamed of sex, I'm just awkward with physical intimacy due to trauma. I guess it's due to that, I really can't know. I get more mentally aroused. 

I'm also big in hypnosis. Well, any mentally based kink is likely my thing. Just to make this short. I can't think of anything else to write.